Anastasia Suen - Developmental Editor

The Shadow of Seth
by Tom Llewellyn (Author)

Booktalk: Sixteen-year-old Seth Anomundy is a product of his environment: in this case, Tacoma, Washington, a working-class port city now undergoing urban renewal. Seth has grown up in Tacoma’s tough neighborhoods, where he’s perfectly at home in Choo-Choo’s boxing gym and Miss Irene’s soul food palace, the Shotgun Shack. With his mom working nights as a cleaner, Seth goes to high school, gets decent grades, and makes money where he can: filling in as cook at the Shotgun Shack, working as a sparring partner, and running errands for Nadel, the clock repairman. Life is hand-to-mouth, but okay–until he gets the news that his mother has been killed. The police don’t care about the death of just another drug addict, so a bewildered Seth takes it upon himself to find the killer. On a clock delivery run, he meets a beautiful rich girl named Azura Lear, who encourages Seth and tries to help track down the killer. But instead of finding answers, Seth finds only trouble. He faces down a gang of baseball-bat-wielding high school jocks and deals with the contempt of Azura’s suspicious father. And then there’s King George–a teenage thug Seth has previously managed to avoid–who has for some reason let it be known that he wants Seth dead. Right now.

Snippet: Nadel called my cell phone just as I got home from school, asking if I could make a pickup. Mom was sleeping. She wouldn’t need her car until she left for work, after dinner. I took her car keys and drove her Jeep over to Nadel’s House of Clocks.

Six Traits Mini Lesson

Traits: Sentence Fluency This young adult mystery begins with a four sentence paragraph. As the curtain opens on this story, we meet the main character and see his life on the stage. His life may be bumpy, but the sentences are not.

In the first sentence of the book, the main character is given a task to perform. Showing us that task also establishes the when and the where of the story setting.

Nadel called my cell phone just as I got home from school, asking if I could make a pickup.

The next sentence adds more details with just three words.

Mom was sleeping.

The third sentence builds on the second sentence by adding more details. We find out why the second sentence was important.

She wouldn’t need her car until she left for work, after dinner.

The two middle sentences let us know the factors the main character considered as he made his decision. In the final sentence of this opening paragraph, the main character has made his decision. He is on the move.

I took her car keys and drove her Jeep over to Nadel’s House of Clocks.

Every word counts. Each word in these four sentences adds a specific detail that readers need to know.

Goodnight Already!
by Jory John (Author) and Benji Davies (Illustrator)

Notice the shiny E.B. WHITE READ-ALOUD HONOR AWARD sticker on the cover!

Booktalk: Meet Bear. He’s exhausted. All he wants is to go to sleep. Meet Duck, Bear’s persistent next-door neighbor. All he wants is to hang out . . . with Bear.

Snippet:
“I’ve never been so tired. I could sleep for weeks. Months, even!”

Six Traits Mini Lesson

Trait: Organization In this fiction picture book, the dialogue at the beginning of a story sets up the ending perfectly. As the story begins, we hear from Bear:

“I’ve never been so tired. I could sleep for weeks. Months, even!”

What Bear wants is clear, but this is the very first page of the story, so we know that Bear won’t get what he wants. Fiction stories have problems to solve, so once we know what the main character wants, it’s the writer’s job to keep that from happening for as long as possible. That’s why readers turn the page–to see what happens next!

Who or what will that problem be? In this story it is Bear’s neighbor, Duck. Duck is wide awake and he wants company. Throughout the book, Duck wakes up Bear again and again.

Ideally, the end of a story is the opposite of the beginning. So what does Bear say on the last page of the book?

“I’ve never been so awake.”

On the previous page, Duck complains that Bear’s grumpiness has worn him out. Duck finally goes home and falls asleep. The ending for both story characters is the opposite of the beginning. The book begins and ends with Bear because he is the main character.

TIP: Allow your main story character to have the last word.

Watch the book trailer.